I’ve been wrapping Christmas presents

Everyday before work this week I wrap a couple presents. Small things for everyone in my life that’s been around. Gifts from grandparents in Michigan. Gifts for nieces and nephews.  Every day Hux comes home from school to a little more magic under the tree. I wait for the feelings that come from the surprise on his face when he notices a new box, or the snowman wrapping paper of a new gift under the tree.
It doesn’t feel forced or fake, but it does feel heavy, this weight to keep Christmas happy this year. So instead of thinking about the doctors appointments, or the growths in her armpits my mom and I talk about gift ideas, decorations and cookies. We talk about planning and separation anxiety for the dogs. We wait for results from tests and decide what’s for dinner. We’re going to have a good Christmas because it’s important to us. We’re going to have a good Christmas for the kids, and for us, the kids of a woman who is staring at a cancer diagnosis. In the meantime, I keep putting presents under the tree.

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